Friday, December 21, 2018

My Postpartum Journey

This post is not just for mothers, but for women everywhere. I am going to get real and personal so just be ready! 

Today I woke up and decided to actually shower before my 8 month old woke up. This never happens! As I was getting undressed the thought came to my mind to weigh myself. We've all heard that without clothes and in the morning you will get the best weight. 

So I step onto the scale and to my surprise see that I am only 5 lbs from my pre-baby weight! I so badly wanted to jump up and down for joy, but that didn't happen. 

I actually was upset. Upset with myself that I had obsessed over this. 

All through high school I struggled with being overweight. Even my first year of college I was 20 lbs heavier than I am now. During my mission is when I lost it. Walking all day every day in ridiculously hot weather can help with that! And also in Chile the amount of fresh veggies and fruits is amazing. (but I didn't eat the bread!) Coming home from my mission I noticed that a lot of guys I knew before were actually starting to notice me now. I was going on dates left and right. But it BUGGED me so bad that before when I was overweight, guys didn't want anything to do with me. 

I managed to keep the weight off even after getting married and until I got pregnant and gained 40 lbs. There were times when I was so mad about gaining that, but there were more times when I delighted in the fact of being pregnant and eating whatever the heck I wanted. 


Oh how I wish I could go back and tell pregnant me to stop obsessing over it. 

I am now almost 8 months postpartum and still 5 lbs from that prebaby weight. 

I thought about that number I saw on the scale a lot this morning. One of the thoughts that came to my mind was, "that's it?". If you were to ask me how I would feeling at this weight 8 months ago I would have said amazed, ecstatic, awesome, beautiful. But I don't feel this way. 

BECAUSE MY WEIGHT DOES NOT DEFINE MY WORTH.

I think in our Instagram and Pinterest world, we obsess over being a certain weight or looking a certain way. Having that nice thin waist and gigantic booty. I am here to tell you that you are beautiful no matter what you weigh or what body type you have.


I have come to notice that I am happy and healthier when I just try to follow the Lord's law of health. In the LDS religion we believe in something called The Word Of Wisdom. Or in other words, the Lord's law of health. Most people think, "oh so you don't drink alcohol or coffee". Yes that's true, but it's so much more than that. 

We believe that we should eat meat sparingly. We believe that fruits and vegetables were created by God to help our bodies. We believe that we should nourish our physical bodies because they are gifts from God. We believe that physical activities help the health of our bodies.

Making these my thoughts when I am choosing what foods to eat are much nicer than the thought of, "you're fat and need to eat better" or "you won't lose weight eating that". 

BE KIND TO YOURSELF

As a fellow mom and friend, just be kind to yourself. Be kind to yourself on your journey. The numbers don't define your worth to God.